I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
Randomize
