Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
Last night: Repeatedly yelled about how the fishbowl tasted like blue, stole a stranger's hat, hugged the DJ for playing my request, made out with my roommate, and abandoned the guy I dragged to the club in the first place
This morning: Hat doesn't fit, hangover headache is blue, and I can't move without getting lightheaded
Listen when they tell you not to drink after giving blood
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
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