marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Randomize