she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
I ran out of diet so I'm mixing captain with a juice box. Being a mom has finally paid off.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
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