no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
