good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
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