how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Randomize
