He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
don't judge my taste in strippers
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
Randomize
