sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
Randomize