Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
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