I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Randomize
