Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
