I don't remember. Are we still dating?
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
We left an ass print on the piano.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
