ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
Randomize