I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
how do flat chested girls get laid?
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
Randomize
