Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Randomize
