i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
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