I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
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