At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
I just threw up in the bathroom next to the zebra exhibit. The kids don't know I skipped a beat. Best nanny, ever.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
Randomize
