I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
SHE JUST SHOVED MY HAND DOWN HER PANTS AT THE BAR
Don't text me with that hand
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
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