I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
Cover your peen. We're going out.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Randomize
