ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Randomize
