I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Randomize
