areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
don't judge my taste in strippers
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Randomize
