Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
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