I like my sex mixed with concussions.
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize
