Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
Randomize