i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Randomize
