yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
