quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
