Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize
