Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
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