I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
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