Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
Randomize
