I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
My boss just texted me, clearly drunk, and said get down here pronto with a handle of rum, 50 lbs. of cold cuts, and a BB gun. This is not why I went to law school.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
Randomize
