dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
My six-margarita-deep ass just used a blow torch to light the match that lit my bong pack. Peak single 🤦ðŸ¼â€â™€ï¸
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
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