There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
Sober January is a disaster.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
Randomize
