Well douche your snatch and let's go!
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
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