You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
Drunk tip #47: Its better to overestimate how many plastic bottles itll take to urinate in, rather then underestimate.
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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