Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
Randomize
