I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
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