No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
Randomize
