I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
Randomize
