Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
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