there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
splinters make it hard to masturbate
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
Randomize
