Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
Text me right after you finish, I want to know how the ghetto fleshlight worked out
How about I just call you while I'm doing it so you can hear my reaction?
He kissed a someone with a penis
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
Randomize
