I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
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