I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Randomize
