I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
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