Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Randomize
