we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
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